Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Our visit on January 20,2005 and the call

Trish and I went to see Mom on January 20, 2005. As always, we never know what to expect as far as her mood. She was doing rather well that night. She had had a new perm and hair cut and looked very good. We all went to the lounge and visited for about 1 1/2 hours. We always bring her alittle bit of goodies and Trish brings any mail that came in her box. Her memory was fairly good that night. Last night Mom called me about 9 pm and wondered how many days ago Dad died. It seemed like only about 2 weeks to her but is now almost 4 years. We talked for about 1 hour and I listened. She could not remember anything and was very confused; but did not cry. Just talked alot of old times and things..........

Saturday, January 08, 2005


Mom on Christmas Day 2004 Posted by Hello

I have been behind on my writing lately and have decided to take a few moments to play catch up here. Bill, Taylor and I went to see Mom Christmas Day and she had just finished a shower. It was about 3 pm that afternoon. She was very weak that day. It was hard for her to make it to the bed and then I had to help her open her gifts. She looked, I thought, so bad that day. It literally broke my heart. What bothers me the most is her quality of life - her body is here; but she is "not". And I know the time is getting shorter. What a beautiful, strong, nuturing mother she was.............oh, the memories. The older I get the more I realize how wonderful she was.........and the love, oh the love - I love you Mommy.

Saturday, January 01, 2005

Checking Out

Death passages are like childbirth. Everyone gets a "due date," and it's utter hogwash. When a woman begins to go into labor, she has no idea whether she's going to have a baby in an hour, or the next week. No one knows how it's going to take. However, in childbirth, the medical profession is allowed to intervene... they speed things up, they schedule cesareans, they don't let the mom or baby suffer if they can help it.

In death, perversely, the doctors let you suffer because their hands are tied. By ours law and by our guilt, by our ignorance and our religious hangovers, we are making suffering a pillar of terminal disease care.
Susie Bright, her own mother recently dieing, Susie Bright talks about one of our biggest disgraces in our country - how we are allowing those in pain and/or dying no alternatives but to what can only be labeled as a cruel, long, and painful death. And it will be our turn soon enough, so all of us should be rather concerned, don't you think?